Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Death Watch Journal for Kevin Varga - DAY 56

I sit here typing this while listening to my radio. I have been listening to more and more talk radio that I ever did before, I never really paid much attention to the views and opinions of these people. I was shocked at the way in which many of those people see me, and other men on death row. I mean sure I have always known that they are staunch supporters of the death penalty, but never have I heard myself described as a rabid animal that should be “put down” for the safety and security of society. One woman said that in her opinion, when a person is sentenced to death the sentence should be carried out immediately, like the same day, hour that the person is sentenced! Yet someone else said that the mode of execution should fit the means with which the victim was killed. I must ask myself when these people became so bloodthirsty? Then I think about the innocent that have been sent to death row. What would these people say to them? I mean I have seen already one man that has been proven to be innocent of the crime that sent him to death row be executed. Do these people believe that one innocent man being “knowingly and willingly” put to death acceptable? The quote is what Texas describes as “murder”. Since Todd Willingham (not sure of the spelling) was proven innocent of the fire that took his daughters lives and subsequently took his when Texas murdered him, should not those involved now be held to the same standards that they have held us? I do not mean the death penalty here, but should charges not be brought against them? What would those people that call for swift and meaningful vengeance say about the fact that Texas has put to death an innocent? I have never claimed to be innocent, only God has the right to judge a man to death, the Bible clearly states this, but will Texas ever acknowledge this fact? I feel that they will only give up their death machine when “it’s taken from their cold, dead hands” Yes it is a sad world we live in when simple men like myself are forced to be the moral compass for the government. Yet I am the man who has been deemed unworthy to continue to breathe. Why should I be held to a higher level of culpability than the very state that will be my murderer?

I am going to close for now. 35 days of life remain to me. I am not afraid to die but this does not mean that I rush forward into the embrace of death either. I will fight until my heart stops and lungs collapse from the poisons that they inject into me. I will not give hope even then because God has me in the palm of his hand.

35 days to live.

Kevin Varga 999368
Polunsky Unit
3872 FM 350 South
Livingston, TX 77351

© Copyright 2010 by Kevin Varga and Thomas Bartlett Whitaker. All rights reserved.


Diosa said...


My brother, I wish I could give you comfort, or be with you in the end....but Kalamazoo, Michigan is so very far away.

It seems like only yesterday when I saw you during your trial. It killed Me to hear you being sentenced. I will NEVER forget that day.

I will never forget you and our 3 brothers. How I long for those days when you use to play around the block, building forts, and having fun.

I will ALWAYS LOVE YOU, and you take a piece of Me with you when you go.

Your sister in life and death,

Bobbie jo

Lady said...

Praying for you and your family.


Deacon Tony said...

I am praying for you and hoping you will not be killed.

texson said...

I would like to point out that Kevin is mistaken or misinformed regarding the Willingham case. His conviction has not been over turned, he has not been found innocent. There is a panel looking into the original Fire Marshal's investigation to see if the methods used to determine the cause of fire where valid methods. I don't want Kevin to mislead any body with the wrong information.

Etiquette said...

I do sincerely believe that there is more than just life and death. I believe that the counsciousness/soul continues with clear vision and without emotion. It is my most humble prayer that you experience marvelous freedom when you escape the prison of the physical body.

brian said...


Although we were never good friends, You and I went to high school together in Mobridge and I always found you to be truly a good person at heart. I felt You and Sean were always good guys beneath the rough exterior and I have some fond memories of those days. I just want you to know that I have been praying for you and hope, by the grace of God, a miracle happens and your life will be spared. Please remember God's mercy for the innocent and those who ask for forgiveness. "1Sam 16:7 (NIV) ...The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." And with that I know God will see the good in your heart and care for you. If the day does come and you are to meet him soon, please take solace in knowing that you WILL be in heaven and be with God the Father. You will also will be and are remembered by many as a good guy with a good heart and we will make sure your story will be heard.

An old friend,
Brian Walther
Mobridge, SD Class of 1988

Love and peace be with you brother.